Hi all,
Been a bit quite on the site so i thought i would just post some funny messages i was reading the other day, enjoy.
You don’t know jack shit
That’s not true, I know him well
Haha
I’m serious
Jack is the son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt Inc. They had one son, Jack. In turn Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt, the deeply religious couple produced 6 children
Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt, and the twins: Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt. Against her parents’ objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out.
However, after being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock and, because her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her previous name.
She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock. Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt.
Two other of the 6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony.
The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd, and Hoarse.
Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world. He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
So there.
LOL
I have actually chortled coke through my nose
friend of mine went to jail last night
he probably isn’t getting out for a while
y?
why?
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it was a girl cop, she was pretty cute too
she said anything you say can and will be held against you….he sat there for a while and said ‘tits’
silic0nsilence: So it’s black friday at CompUSA.
Slider: Yea
silic0nsilence: We were to open up at 12am. It’s 11:58pm and there is a HUGE line of blood-thirsty, hard drive-wanting, maniacs. So my friend dares me to scream we have one xbox360.
Slider: Holy shit.
silic0nsilence: So he gives me $20. I go up to the gate and scream, “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WE HAVE JUST RECIEVED ONE XBOX360!!” Immediatly people are storming the gate, passing me money through the cage to get it. They were screaming and knocked over this old lady. My boss just looks at me with these red eyes. In them, I saw fear and rage.
Slider: Omg you dumb shit!
Slider: Wait a second, it’s 12:46A, and it’s black Friday. What did this happen minutes ago? Shouldn’t you be at work?
silic0nsilence: Yeah..
silic0nsilence: Pretty sure I don’t work at CompUSA any more..
Scud: The other day, in the park, I was wondering why frisbees look bigger and bigger as they get closer to you
Scud: And then it hit me
if my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCULATOR = EVERLASTING FUN
a sprite is anything not static
a sprite is a variable object
be it 2d or 3d
a sprite is a fucking soda
you god damn geekass bastards
I had a boyfriend once that made me suck him off while I had a mouthful of beer.
HAHAHAHA that was me bitch!
DANNY?!?!?!
MOM?!?!?!?!
so there’s this pimp right. he’s collecting money from his three ho’s.
he goes to the first ho and asks for his $100. she says, “But I only owe you $50!”
he slaps her and says, “don’t correct me, bitch!”
he asks the next ho for $150. she says, “But I only owe you $100!”
he slaps her and says, “don’t correct me, bitch!”
now he goes to his third ho.
he asks for $200. “but I only owe you $150!”
he slaps her and says, “don’t correct me, bitch!”
next he visits the fourth ho.
he asks her for his $250.
hold on, wait a sec
what?
you said three ho’s, not four. idioth.
*Tedward slaps Thy_Dungeonman
Don’t correct me, bitch.
wtf
ESPN is showing 2003 national jump rope championship
who the hell watches jump rope competiti— ooh bouncy
Now if only they would introduce jump rope for the commonwealth games.





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